The Theology of Belonging

What does it mean to belong? We belong to families, circles of friends, clubs/organizations, churches, interest groups, secret societies, and most importantly we belong to God. We learn from an early age what it means to physically and emotionally belong or not belong. If you come from a close knit family that shows acceptance, care, patience, and above all love you probably have a pretty good idea what it means to belong. If growing you were different from the other kids and never fit in the “in” crowd, never got picked first in gym class, always had less valentines (even though everyone was supposed to bring one for everyone), and never felt accepted for who you were, you might have a good idea what it means to not belong. If it was always easy for you to belong and then you have trouble finding a place to fit in you might wonder what is wrong with you. If you never felt like you belonged and now you have found your place you might always be waiting for someone to come and say “sorry we were wrong, you don’t belong”.  No matter which side of the understanding of belonging you fall, I offer these thoughts, on what I have named the “theology of belonging”.

This term “theology of belonging” is one that, to the best of my knowledge, is not a coined term. I have not found anything specifically written about it but there could be stuff out there. It is based primarily on the idea that no matter how God has created you-you belong to God. But it is more than that. It is more than just saying the words “you belong to God”. It is grasping the concept that when you feel like you don’t fit anywhere else, you fit with God. This spiritual understanding of belonging is different than our cultural understanding of belonging.  Mostly because belonging to God is not like belonging to the high school band, the Rotary club, or the fraternal organization you joined in college. Belonging to God is something that never goes away. This sense of belonging doesn’t leave when you graduate or move away or forgot to pay your alumni dues. This belonging to God is, in my opinion, the best but most exhausting thing to ever happen to us.

This is most definitely not a theology in the way most might think of theology. In fact it is probably more like an abstract idea connecting multiple theological understandings together in a way that makes sense to me, someone who didn’t always “belong”.  When I say I didn’t belong I don’t mean in the negative way described above but rather I floated around in several different groups. In all my “circles of friends” the only things that connected them was me. I don’t say that in an egotistical way like “without me they wouldn’t have existed”. What I mean is each group I was connected with had nothing in common. There was no common thread that would make me “belong” to these groups except that I (me, myself) wanted to be part of them.

In our culture we often limit our idea of belonging to the current situations and places we find ourselves. The people we know and see on a regular basis, the people who make up our families, circle of friends, organization, etc. We rarely think about what “group” we might find ourselves in next because for many of us our days are only filled with people we already know, care for, accept, and love. We forget about the other people who come in and out of our lives quickly who don’t fit in a category- family, friend, church person, co-worker, club member.

We focus as a culture primarily on the physical belonging and not as much on the spiritual belonging. That is where, for me, this idea of the theology of belonging came from. The people we pass on the street or in the coffee shop or at the grocery store, the people we might smile at but never speak to, they belong to the same God we do. The blessing and curse of being human- because we belong to God we also belong to each other (all of us- even the not so nice people we want to disown).  That is why I said earlier that belonging to God is the best but most exhausting thing to ever happen to us.

The thing I have discovered about this “theology of belonging” I have created is that it has become part of your daily mind set. It has to be worked into your life in such a way that pushes you to look at every human encounter (even the one with the not so nice folks) as an opportunity to express your belonging to God.

For me it is a theology (albeit a work in progress) that serves as a reminder that everyday I belong to a unique group of people created by God. A group of people that I am supposed to care for, show acceptance, understanding and compassion towards, and above all love not because I receive these things from them but because I have received these things from God.

I know this isn’t a foreign concept to anyone that I know who reads this blog. Maybe (because I have been writing other things all day) this is an incoherent mess and no one will understand what I am trying to say but I wonder- do others understand the way I do


This almost became "Theological Friday"