Braving The Waters

 This past Thursday November 5th, was 10 years since I posted my very first blog here. I have been very sporadic in my writing. I have not gained a huge following and that is ok with me. I started this space as a space for me. A space to reflect, to share, to my own insight(often because it differs with where the congregation I am serving stands on some things). I do hope it is a space for those who follow and those who happen upon it, are able engage in some way. Even if that engagement is to say, "I don't agree".  As I continue on my journey of becoming a spiritual director, I hope this space will become one where people can spend time in their own reflection, meditation and prayer. I hope to offer more opportunity for anyone who reads this to engage in an active prayer life.  Here is a reflective vespers service I wrote for this year's Women's retreat for the Christian Church (DOC) in the Upper Midwest. This was a closing vespers service but could be used at an...

Good morning! It is not a secret that I am not exactly a morning person. I can get up in the morning and function it just takes me a little while to "be awake". There are a few things and a few times of year that are the "exception to the rule". -Any week that I am counselling or directing camp -Any time I am in WV/Pa visiting family and friends -Hospital or other morning visits with church members Recently I added meeting a friend for a morning walk 2-3 times a week. Today I am adding another. In September my spiritual direction certification classes started. Our entire scheduled was changed because of COVID and not being able to gather in the same space. So we met online and began to get to know each other. It is not easy to get to know people in this way, but it is slowly happening. Even though we didn't get to spend a concentrated week together, we are still connected. This group meetings monthly. early in the morning, on zoom. My Spiritual Direction Cohort...

I am an internal processor. I am a contemplative person who needs time to think before I speak. Unless we’ve been friends for more than a year, you probably think I don’t talk very much. My silence often gets me in trouble because my silence is often interpreted that I don’t care. One group has decided that I don’t care and therefore stand, complicit, with the oppressive force. Others think my silence means I am complacent and don’t care enough to even make a comment. The problem however is that I do care, it just takes me too long to get my thoughts together and by the time I have them ready, it’s too late. But it’s not too late. It is never too late to stand up against something that is wrong. It is never to late to stand up for something you believe in. Over the past week I have done a lot of reading, a lot of observing, a lot of praying, and a lot of weeping. Reading, observing, praying, weeping… Communities of color don’t need my tears, They don’t need me to stand to the side and ...

The weekly devotion I have been using this Advent seasons ends with this blessing each week: May God bless us with mornings when we find (hope, peace, joy) in aligning our ideas with God's ideas. May God bless us with noon times when we find (hope, peace, joy) in aligning our work with God's work. May God bless us with evenings when we find (hope, peace, joy) in reflecting and giving thanks to God. You can find more information about this devotion here (thanks for this great resource!)   As I reread this week’s meditation again this morning I can't help but find tears in my eyes.  The scripture for this week’s meditation time came from Isaiah 35:1-10 . “The wilderness and the dry land shall be glad…”  As I read this same scripture again this morning my heart is aching for those who are in a dry land with no hope. War torn countries, broken families with no chance of reconciliation, nations devastated by famine and illness at epidemic levels, just to na...

This week seemed “off”. I couldn’t put my finger on what was not right but I just felt out of rhythm. I went through a mental check list but still wasn’t sure what was missing. It hit me on Wednesday night after a great day with fellow clergy women and a fantastic church Halloween party…I didn’t post last Saturday. It wasn’t a conscious decision not to post it simply didn’t happen. It wouldn’t be impossible to come up with a handful of excuses to why I didn’t take the time to do it. There is no excuse, I mean honestly the week before I made time to post while at the wedding reception of one of my best friends...no excuse. I asked myself a few weeks ago if I had gotten enough into the “habit” of writing while on sabbatical, I was certain I had. By not writing, even a simple prayer, my entire week was thrown off. While I was on sabbatical I “resurrected” this blog was for others, so people would know where I was, what I was doing, and what I was learning.  Now, I am not longer o...

The first week back was not a quiet week by all means but not the “all hell breaking loose” kind of week I had anticipated. It was as typical as any week can be in congregational ministry with the added bonus of a 300+ email inbox! I joked with several people on Sunday that I am going to go away more often because I was feeling all the love before, during, and after worship. It is truly wonderful to be back among the beautiful people of God I serve here in Oskaloosa.  Sunday I reached my hug quota times 1,000 I am sure. Monday and Tuesday launched me into deep “pastor mode” with hospital visits, staff meeting, and evening prayers with a few people. Wednesday I was quickly reminded of the amazing work our church does for and with children and youth (I also reached my hug quota without doubt) and was warmly welcomed back into the choir fold! Thursday brought meetings and sermon prep (Job 23, if you’re interested). Friday and Saturday brought both time for being with friends, fin...

In this final few days of sabbatical as I begin to re-enter “the real world”, I want to thank each of you who have prayed for and with me over these almost 60 days. I have spent time over these past two months reflecting on eleven years of ministry and know that God continues to call me to this extraordinarily beautiful life with all of the highs and lows of working with, living with, and loving Gods people. I am looking forward to these last few days however my heart and soul are ready to be back with the wonderful people of First Christian Church and Oskaloosa! See you very soon. Week Nine Hope for the week:  I hope the people I have been away from are as excited to see me as I am to see them! Is there an Answer (last week’s question): How many pages will I write for my devotion/resource? It is hard to say how many pages have been written, however I made progress in outline, structure, and worship ideas. Question of the Week:...

September 19(posted on the 20 th ) Day Fifty 50/51 I realized this morning when I woke up that today is Sunday. This means that yesterday was Saturday and I forgot to write and post this blog. The days of the week all run together when they are not marked by a daily work routine. I have had a routine don't get me wrong (get up, some yoga stretches, breakfast with mom…etc). Which is good sabbatical, in my understanding, is supposed to get me out of my regular normal routine so when I return to it I am recharged and refueled and ready to run(both literally and figuratively).  I have done such a wonderful job at deviating from my “normal” routine that I rarely know what day of the week it is. That has been a blessing. I am however ready to begin transitioning, just a little bit, into a more normal daily routine. This will begin by returning to my normal time zone!! I will be doing a great deal of traveling this week so I ask for your prayers while I am on the highways and...

Tonight I am writing from a place I have called “home” for many years. Cedar Lakes Conference Center in Ripley WV. This is the place where I attended church camp and in later years counselled and directed those same camps. It is a Holy place for me even though it is not a “church” camp. This time I am here in a slightly different capacity. A daughter come home, not a wayward  wanderer  but a child of God who was given both roots and wings in the most sacred of ways in the most sacred of places. I am here in this place as the keynote speaker for the WV Disciples Women’s Spiritual Life Retreat. I am in awe, and I’m not sure why, at how the Spirit of God has been at work these past few days. I should back up, before arriving here Friday afternoon I spent a whirlwind weekend in Kansas City celebrating the marriage of dear friends, I stayed up way to late with one of my oldest, closest, bestest friend talking about life even though we already know everything about each other’s...

Just over three weeks at the shore brought me many new friends and experiences, it enriched my soul, and most importantly reminded me of my call to ministry. It was however not good for the soles of my feet. Don’t tell my physical therapist but he was right flip flops, for people with bone spurs on their heels, are of the "devil". Pain in both heels is a small price to pay however to be reminded of God's greatness in a world that often seems less than great. In less than 5 minutes of reading the news of the day it is easy to become discouraged. It is easy to think no one, not even God "has it together".  I was reassured over and over however, that for every negative we might see or experience in the world around us there are more acts of kindness and humility  that we don't see. If we want to know that more good than bad is happening in the world we have to be part of making it happen. While without out doubt God "has it together" much more than ...

The weeks are running together because of the timing of when retreats start and end. I began my “3 weeks” on a Tuesday but my 6 day retreat began on a Thursday…When I posted last Saturday I was almost 2 days into my retreat. Now, as I sit here typing this reflection, I am 2 days out of my retreat back into to volunteering (believe or not I am washing dishes and cleaning bathrooms again). The 6 day retreat was a wonderful experience. It was time spent deepening my understanding and belief that all things are part of God’s creation.   We were silent, except for the hour we met in the morning after breakfast, during signing in morning mas, and the hour we met in the evening. You think being quiet and being silent are the same thing until you experience it for yourself. There were a great number of extremely loud silent people on retreat with me. While they weren’t talking, they were stomping through the hallways, shutting doors loudly…I am sure to other I was a very loud quiet ...